Old dog, old tricks

Those who can—do; those who can’t—teach. But hey, even if you can’t teach, you can still be a substitute teacher. Or so it would seem based on my recent experience.

I started substituting to supplement my freelance income, at least until I find my dream job. (yeah, seems like I might be doing this for a while...)

Anyway, last week I was a substitute French teacher. This prompted many questions, from friends, family and students alike, about whether or not I knew French. Good question—the answer to which is nope, not a lick.

Upon seeing a non-French speaking substitute at the helm of their class, the students assumed they’d be seeing a video. To tell the truth, I was sort of assuming that as well. After all, I can press “play” and “stop” on a foreign language video as well as I can on an English speaking video.

There wasn’t a video however. Instead, we completed and corrected a series of worksheets. Hard to explain how all this worked, but suffice it to say that I’m sure it wasn’t the most enriching educational experience they ever had.

Today I subbed for a F/CE teacher. The abbreviation stands for Family & Consumer Education, back in the day, I believe this was called Home Economics. As I read over the lesson plans, I noted that the first class was going to watch a video (yippie!). So before going on to read what the teacher had planned for the next class, I set about locating the elements required for successful video viewing—TV, video player, tape, remotes for TV & player, etc... It wasn’t until after the video was in progress that I took a look at what the next class had in store for me.

The lesson plan said I should hand out some worksheets and a crepe recipe, and then use the recipe to show the class how to make crepes. Whaa? I read it over and over again, but that’s what it said! I even looked on the back of the page hoping to find a note about Paula Dean making a guest appearance, but no such luck. Mind you up until that point, the closest I’d come to making crepes myself was ordering them in a restaurant, and yet there I was being expected to demonstrate their creation in front of a class!

Of course this was made all the worse as there are some “differently-abled” students that have aides who accompany them throughout the school day. It’s bad enough to make a complete jack-ass out of yourself in front of a group of high school students, but quite another when there are a couple adult aides sprinkled about.

But what could I do? I decided that I needed to draw on my strengths and get through the task at hand. My background hadn’t provided me with a wealth of cooking experience, so instead, I relied on one of the most important skills I learned in the corporate world.

Delegation!

Yep, instead of making the crepes myself, I asked if anyone in the class wanted to show “all of us” how to make crepes. Four girls took up the challenge and did a bang up job of it all!

The Lion’s share of my input came in the form of hand-washing reminders and asking if everyone had received flu shots.

Yep, your tax dollars at work.