Nine lives, third house

On the subject of failed experiments. I got a cat on October 29th.

I don’t know if it was age-related memory loss, or good old fashioned denial, but for some odd reason I seemed to overlook the fact that I don’t really like cats. Apparently, not even a little.

That said, I’m sure the fact that I got rid of the cat exactly a week after I picked her up did nothing to help my positive karma flow, and instead probably helped fuel the cosmic kick in the ass that I’ve been experiencing as of late.

In my defense, it’s not like I brought the cat to the humane society or anything that irresponsible. Nope, I gave it to some friends who simply adore her. In fact, here’s an email her new mamma sent:

Bella is awesome! I love having her there; and I can't believe I am
saying that! She sleeps with me at night; she falls asleep either around
my neck or on top of my face - she is so cuddly! Yesterday I took the
afternoon off and napped in the chair, and she napped with me the whole
time. So far she's not touched anything she's not supposed to touch;
although all the plants are proving a huge temptation and it's just a
matter of time. But that's alright. When she's ready to wake up in the
morning, she drags her favorite toy up the stairs and to my side of the
bed where she then jumps up and taps me on the nose with her paw until
I'm up and ready to play with her. Adorable!!

Now while I’m overjoyed that they love the cat and the cat loves them, her email makes me question why I even tried to own a cat in the first place. Seriously, it sleeps on her FACE and that’s a good thing? Also, the cat touches her nose (with her litter box “poop paws”) and wakes her up?? The chances of any of these activities being allowed to occur in my household are quite simply nonexistent. Well, unless I was in a comma.

Bottom line, the cat needed WAY MORE attention than my non-pet owning background allowed me to provide, but I did try. Unfortunately, within the first couple hours it was apparent that the cat was obsessed with me. Not because I was particularity caring or demonstrative, but because I was the only one there to play with or be petted by. When I consulted friends about this situation, they suggested that the cat might be bored. So I went out and bought $20 worth of cat toys and even looked at a couple stores for a laser pointer, because I read online that cats like chasing red dots. She did like a couple of toys, but her favorite was still the live-action version (me) who spent so much time behind closed doors trying to get away from her.

Alas, thanks to Hanne and David my home is once again pet free and all my doors are open! When you think about it though, a cat was probably too much of a stretch for a first pet. I don’t even have house plants for crying out loud!

At this point, I’m thinking a gold fish might be more my speed.