Nov 29, 2011

A scary old elf indeed

His pants are shiny, his bag is black and he’s wearing a U of O football shirt... is that really supposed to be Santa Claus? Looks more like Creeper Claus to me! And don’t even get me started on the way he’s holding that helmet—dollars to donuts he’s hiding more than a candy cane under that thing!

If you ask me, it’s all a bit frightening. Then again, I’ve encountered a Santa in creeps clothing before.

When I was growing up, a guy living across the street from our grade school would regularly put on a Santa hat and furry red coat. Then he’d stand outside the fence and stare at us during noon recess. Sound a little creepy? Well yeah, it was absurdly creepy!

Our teachers told us he dressed that way and watched us because he had a “mental problem.” Perhaps that was supposed to be reassuring. I’m here to tell you, it was not.

At any rate, to this unfortunate yard decoration is giving off the same creeptastic vibe as that leering elf of long ago. Honestly, a guy wearing a few Santa accessories with a T-shirt (of all things) and pants that don’t even match? Let me clue you, that ain’t Santa Claus—not by a long shot!

And just when I thought it couldn’t get any more disturbing, here’s one from an NCAA school that’s been in the news recently:

Picking up on the creepiness now?

Yeah. Probably best to stay away from his sack. I’m just saying...

Sep 14, 2011

Up, up—go away!!

To all the people who told me mice can’t climb walls...

I say bullshit!

Sep 4, 2011

found on

Hmm, I don’t know anyone that needs one of these—so two seems sort of extreme.

Then again, given the current state of labor unions in Wisconsin, this might be a great time for a savvy entrepreneur to set up a sweat shop.